What My Nephew Learned about Santa Part 2

On Christmas morning, (after the disappointment of not tasting Santa's cookie) my nephew Aidan was handed a gift "from Santa" from under the tree. He immediately opened it, tearing away at the wrapper as fast as his 3-year-old hands could. When he saw the box of the Thomas the Train set, he smiled widely and said "Look! Santa got it from the store!" I guess he didn't buy the concept of Santa's little elves hammering away at the North Pole workshop.

What My Nephew Learned about Santa

I've been spending the holidays with my brother Jerick, his wife Liz and my nephew Aidan in Buena Park, California. Aidan is three years old, and this is the first Christmas that he was made aware of the "existence" of Santa Claus. His teachers at his pre-school gave him a cookie to leave for Santa when he came by to drop off his toys under the Christmas tree. Aidan wanted to taste the cookie, but we convinced him to leave it untouched for Jolly Old St. Nick, beside a glass of milk. On Christmas morning, he rushed out of his room but instead of checking for presents under the tree, he went straight to check the plate where the cookie was. "Santa finished the cookie," he said, greatly disappointed. "He didn't share."

On Solitude and Eyesight

In the four months that I've lived in the US, I've spent a LOT of time alone. I've never had so much me-time in my whole life. I like being by myself, probably more than a lot of people I know. Sometimes though I find myself getting tired of my company, and over here I don't really have much of a choice, I'm pretty much stuck with just me. Anyway, one unpleasant side effect of being alone a lot is that I'm going to need glasses soon. Being alone has left me a ton of time for reading books (that are not remotely related to anything I'm studying), spending time in front of the computer (surfing, not writing papers), and watching TV (totally no educational value). All these activities have caused my eyes to deteriorate at an alarming rate. That's how I finally made the connection between glasses and personality types.

Lord of the Dance

Yes, it was another free show that I watched, this time a dance production featuring Celtic dance. Lord of the Dance has apparently been watched by a lot of people all over the world. If their website is to be believed, it's "the most acclaimed show in musical history". I can't vouch for the basis of that claim, but it was a great show. Group tap dancing always amazes me, and after watching people do that I always think "I'm a loser! What am I doing with my life? I should have learned to tap dance!" (then again, maybe not.)

The highlight of this show for me was the part where the lead solo male dancer came out wearing a sequined gold 8-inch wide belt with the words (take a guess...) "Lord of the Dance". And another guy actually challenged him to a "dance duel" for it. (You could say this is similar to other sports where the competitors win via "tap out"). The antagonist cheated and got the belt from him. Of course the REAL Lord of the Dance eventually tapped his way into getting it back. A dance concert just doesn't get any better than that.

The Lettermen and Christmas

Last week, I took another undeserved break from writing school papers and watched The Lettermen's Christmas Concert in the university. Before you start thinking that I splurged some of my meager allowance on a Lettermen concert, and a Christmas concert at that (my friends know of my lack of Yuletide spirit), it was actually just another show that my friend Bob had free tickets to which he generously shared.

It was fun to find out that the group had sung the original versions of some songs that I like such as "Goin' Out of my Head", "The Way You Look Tonight", and "When I Fall in Love". But what I really enjoyed about the show were the trio's all-red outfits. The three of them wore red suits with matching red shoes. There's nothing like seeing shoes that go perfectly with the Poinsettia on stage to bring out the Christmas spirit.

Hog Wild

One thing that's interested me about university life in Mizzou is watching women's volleyball. My (American) friend Bob and his brother Gary always bring me and Gil (my only Filipino friend here) to watch the games. This is the best team the University has ever had, and they were ranked #7 in the US at some point during the season.

But this is not about the Mizzou Tigers; rather, a team they played against last night, specifically, the Arkansas Razorbacks. Now, that's a nice enough name for an athletic team, but apparently they also call themselves the "Arkansas Hogs" (Hogs, after all, are what Razorbacks are). I don't mean to discriminate against pigs, but I found it amazing that any group would be brave enough to call themselves that. In Philippine collegiate sports, that's just not going to happen. I don't see the UP Maroons, La Salle Green Archers and the Ateneo Blue Eagles competing against, let's say, the PUP Pigs (no offense to PUP, just a random example), or the Beda Baboys (sorry, San Beda, purely an alliterative choice). Maybe they can have "Baboy Spelling" during competitions... "B-A-B-O-Y! Ba-Boy! Ba-Boy! Ba-Boy Kami!!!!!!!"

The Best Molten Chocolate Cake

Whenever I see "Molten Chocolate Cake" on a restaurant's menu, I simply have to try it. Last week, I found the best of this kind of cake that I have tasted so far in a restaurant in Chicago. When my classmate Nikki found out that I was in the Windy City for the Thanksgiving break, she told me that I should check out Grand Lux Cafe 0ff Michigan Avenue, which I did as soon as I could. I ordered their Molten Chocolate Cake right away, since the waiter said it took 30 minutes to bake. They prepare each cake from scratch, he said. After a couple of appetizers (no main course to leave room for the cake), it was time for dessert, and it did not disappoint. The chocolate gushed out from the still-warm cake, and what made it different from others was that the edges of the cake were chewy, while the rest of the cake was moist. I can't wait to get back to Chicago to have it again.

RENT

I have a ton of work to finish before school ends next week, so logically, instead of doing my papers and finishing my requirements, i chose to procrastinate and watch "Rent" with fellow-procrastinator and Rent enthusiast Nikki (it was her second time to watch the movie in as many days). So I sniffled my way through the parts which never fail to make me cry, and sang along with my favorite songs; and as always, "No day but today!" rang through my head after the show. This time though, when I left the moviehouse, it unfortunately had an addendum: "No day but today! (...to finish your literature review...) The songs simply weren't enough today to fend off the terror of meeting my looming deadlines...

The Post-Vacation Crash

My week-long Thanksgiving break is over and it's back to school for me tomorrow. I spent the week in Chicago, and it was great to be back in a big city, with the sound of honking horns, traffic snarls, and lots and lots of people. As always though after a break I'm feeling the downside of any trip, which is, basically, its end. That's why I flew back to Columbia on Saturday, so I'd have the whole Sunday to psyche myself for my return to school. One thing I've learned, you always need a short vacation AFTER your vacation; to soften the inevitable crash when you return to the reality of school, or work, or whatever it is you're taking a break from.

Winter has come

Technically, winter is still a month away. I thought I had some time to prepare myself for the cold that I've dreaded ever since I found out I was going to live in Missouri. The other day though, I checked the temperature, (I do this every morning with great anxiety) and saw that it was 16 degrees Fahrenheit, which is nearly -9 degrees Celsius. So I went to school in my thickest coat, and other cold-weather paraphernalia that my friends had given me. As always, I started walking to class with my hair wet, since I never got into the habit of blowing it dry after taking a bath. After walking a few minutes, I felt my hair and thought that something had fallen on it, because I felt something hard on my head. I touched my hair some more and realized that the water had frozen on the strands, and what I was feeling was a hair popsicle. I guess there was no denying then, winter had definitely arrived.

A Weird Sign of Homesickness

When I arrived in the US to study, I tried to acculturate to the country by speaking in (shame, shame) slang. The dictionary definition of this word is not what I mean; in the Philippines, speaking in slang simply means speaking with an (affected) American twang. Of course, there were practical reasons for this; mainly, my classmates couldn't understand me if I spoke in my usual Philippine-style English. So there I was, trying to speak like them, with my intonation going up at the end of sentences like there was a question mark at the end of each statement(?). For the first three months, I thought I got the hang of it and congratulated myself on sounding just like a native.

A week ago, though, I noticed that I started stuttering when I'd talk to my classmates. I suddenly found myself starting sentences with "ano..." and ending them with "yata" or "kasi", even though I knew full well that no one had any idea what those words meant. I realized soon enough that these lapses into speaking in Filipino was a sign that I was homesick. I've generally adjusted to life alone so far from home, but I guess a part of me was rebelling against all the English-speaking I'd been doing. My tongue couldn't take it anymore, and it missed the the doubled vocabulary that speaking in Taglish afforded.

I may have acclimatized to the Missouri cold, and I may have weaned myself away from following Filipino time... but I've found that it will take a lot more effort not to miss speaking, joking, and cursing in Filipino.

Portable Karaoke

Among all the features of my Powerbook, two that I find very useful as a karaoke-loving Filipino are the dashboard widgets called Sing That Tune and Harmonic. These widgets are little boxes that appear on your desktop, and they display the lyrics of whatever song is playing on ITunes. Then you can synchronize these lyrics with your IPod, so you can sing along with your favorite songs on the go.

You don't have to look for the lyrics on Google to cut and paste anymore, these widgets do the job for you. Amazing how we can channel the immense powers of technology into really trivial albeit fun uses. This widget was tailor-made for Filipinos. Expect people wearing those white earbuds to belt out Madonna or Air Supply throughout ENTIRE songs now (not just during the memorized refrain).

Canoeing Down Missouri River


A couple of weeks ago, some American friends of mine, Bob and Carol, invited me and another Filipino Fulbrighter named Gil to join their family on a float trip down a portion of the Missouri River. Being the geographical moron that I am, I cannot remember exactly where this river was. All I can recall is that we drove some 4 hours to get there, with a stop-over for dinner at a town which boasted a total of two stoplights. We went there Friday evening, set up tents, and turned in early.

The next day was beautiful, with the sun shining and not a single cloud to break the blue overhead. We started canoeing, 2 to a boat, at 10 am, stopped at a shady area to have lunch, then continued paddling on. Floating along the river was very relaxing, though we had some problems paddling when the water became too shallow. We pulled our canoes to the banks to go inside a cave, which was an interesting experience. I had never gone quite so deep inside a cave before, and the stalactites and stalagmites were beautiful. At first I was stepping gingerly on the ground, avoiding the water, but after squishing my shoes into thick red mud, I decided it was easier to just submerge my shoes and wash the mud off right there instead of removing dry mud when I got back home. We got back to our campsite around 3, washed up and had a huge dinner round a bonfire. The highlight of the meal for me was s'mores (fire-roasted marshmallows and milk chocolate squeezed between graham crackers). Then again, dessert is the highlight of any meal, as far as I'm concerned.

We headed back to Columbia after a huge breakfast on Sunday. When I got home, I was so thankful to Bob and Carol for bringing me along on the trip. The break came at the perfect time, smack in the middle of the semester when I was on the verge of burning out from dealing with academic demands. The respite was brief, but seeing the natural treasures of Missouri up close recharged my spirit enough to make me a little more enthusiastic about school work... or so I thought. When I woke up for a brand new school week on Monday, I decided I needed time to get down from the high of my mini-vacation, so I slept in, and all my teachers missed me that day.

On Whippets and Children

A lot of people have sung praises of motherhood. Though I've never been a mother, I can understand some of the hype about children. The irresistible baby smell, the adorable way toddlers talk, the sheer cuteness of little people... the list goes on and on. However, there are others who just don't buy into the motherhood bit for reasons including (but not limited to) the pain of giving birth, the incessant diaper-changing, and the smart-aleck attitude of adolescents and teens.

For these types, I recommend having whippets, a breed of dog that belongs to the hound family. Here are ten reasons why they are a good option for people who are not into having children. (Most of these qualities are common to all dogs, though.)

1. You can choose exactly which dog you want to have. Then if they have ugly puppies in the future, you can just give them away.
2. When they misbehave, you can put them in a cage or on a leash without fear of being arrested.
3. It is easy to make them come to you when you call.
4. They never talk back.
5. They are always loving and sweet.
6. They don't eat much.
7. They will never smoke, drink alcohol, or do drugs.
8. Putting them through school is completely optional.
9. You need to bathe them only once a month, and they won't even smell that much if you do bathe them less often.
10. You can have new puppies even when your biological clock has ticked its last.

Just like everything else, having whippets has its downside. There's the shedding and the barking, and relieving themselves in unexpected places (though babies do this too). But the benefits of having them far outweigh the costs. Because whippets (and most dogs) are so lovable though, the biggest disadvantage to having them is actually their doggie life span. In all probability you will outlive them, so you have to be prepared to cope eventually with the grief of their loss.

Things I Have To Get Used To

I've been living in the US for 2 and 1/2 months now, and I would say I've acculturated well, for the most part. One would think it would be so easy to adjust to living in the US, since Manila does have a Starbucks in every other corner. Well, I've found that the little things are sometimes the hardest to learn.

I have to get used to all the doors working in a uniform manner. You pull it to go into a building, you push to go out. Sounds simple, but I still have to pause outside doors and chant a mantra (pull-in! push out! pull-in! push-out!) to make sure I open it the right way. (to clarify... doors in the Philippines open any which way; sometimes you pull to go in, sometimes you push, sometimes there's no door at all! just like most things in my country, doors don't follow a system...)

I have to get used to squirrels running all over the place. As someone used to seeing rats running about from city sewers, I still jump instinctively whenever I see these animals from the corner of my eye, half-expecting them to be rabies-and-leptospirosis-ridden rodents.

And finally... I have to get used to the speed with which Americans eat. I once joined my classmates for lunch at a pizza place, and found myself in the middle of eating my single slice as they all stood up to go after each eating two slices (and they actually left me eating alone in the table... a practice totally alien to Filipinos).

The Undergraduate and the Passive-Aggressive

I used to love Fridays. Like a lot of other people in the working or student world, T.G.I.F. was my battlecry. WAS. Now I dread the last day of the week.

To explain... I have a class on Convergence Reporting that meets Mondays and Wednesdays. Now that's totally fine. The problem is that part of the demand of this particular class requires that I work with a team of 3 other members, to produce a story every week that should be handed in by Friday at 5 pm. Meeting deadlines is nothing new to me, as I'd been used to cramming to do just that for the past several years in the television station I worked for back in the Philippines (to admit exactly how many years would reveal my age, thus the vagueness in reference to length of tenure). What IS new to me is that I try to meet this deadline with undergraduates; juniors, to be exact. American juniors, to be even more precise. That spells A-G-G-R-E-S-S-I-V-E, a personality type I have some trouble with, since I'm more a member of Club Passive-Aggressive.

So each Friday, we'd be scrambling to meet the deadline, trying to come up with a script for radio or TV or a magazine or the Internet, or a combination of these, as demanded by the assignment. As an unusually unassertive person (even back home), it's very stressful for me to deal with these young very aggressive students who always want to have their way, most of whom believe they know best. I am only one of two graduate students in that class, and the other one is a fresh graduate who is also American. A typical Friday would go like this.

Undergrad : Hey we need to write a script for our story.
Me: OK.
Undergrad : OK, I've started on working on it, and here's what I've got. What do you think?
Me: (After gathering up enough guts to actually say something) Well... I think MAYBE you COULD cut up this sentence, since long sentences are discouraged in broadcast. (I was not even trying to sound experienced, our teacher had already told us this in class).
Undergrad: Well, I think this sentence is perfectly fine as is. I don't understand why I'd have to cut this up! It sounds fine! (Throws her hands up in the air and dramatically pushes away from the computer) If you want to cut it, then YOU do it, because I'm not going to do it. I just can't! I hate rules! Why does everything have to be done a certain way! (Rolls her eyes at me as if I'm just a stupid blind rule-follower)
Me: (placating and ready to turn tail) Well, I don't really feel that strongly about it. Leave the sentence as it is, it's fine. (my thought bubble: Girl, you'll be eaten alive in the real world. Try telling that to your future editor)

This has been pretty much the weekly Friday routine, and it is difficult to explain exactly how and why these situations stress me out. So... I've decided to give up. I'm quitting the Convergence sequence next semeseter. I know I am weak... I buckled under the glare of the Undergraduate. But I also know that retreat is sometimes the best (and only) weapon of the Passive-Aggressive, when it is actually an option. Well, I do have a choice. I don't HAVE to quietly steam when a 19-year-old orders me around, and I don't want to engage in power struggles with people who think that the Philippines is somewhere in Latin America. Except for a couple of pretty cool classmates, I'm not going to miss them at all. Maybe next semester I'll have my Fridays back. Then I can celebrate by having a beer somewhere where my classmates can't get in unless they flash a fake ID.

The Eternal Student

As the name of the blog implies, this chronicles the adventures of this particular eternal student. I know there are a lot of eternal students out there, as this term is very broad, and it has numerous definitions.

One type of person who falls under this category is the student who finds a way to never leave college. These people have a knack for staying in school for an unbelievable number of years without being booted out. They enroll in the minimum amount of classes possible, drop them when needed, and change majors quickly, just as one department plans to kick them out. They have an uncanny ability to maneuver through the university's system to be able to extend the maximum residency rule, sometimes to a double-digit number of years. When the university finds out about their overstaying existence and finally gives them the boot, or their parents just get tired of paying their tuition, they manage to find a job that will support their student lifestyle. So they go to their jobs, then rush back to the university in their free time to hang out with their decades-younger classmates or orgmates. This situation is more easily maintained if the job they've found is in the university itself.

Another type of person who can be described as an eternal student is one who has taken to heart the maxim "the classroom is not the student's world, the world is the student's classroom", and has no compunction about actually saying it out aloud in public. These people think of everything as a learning process. ("He broke by heart when he went out with my best friend, but at least I learned something from the experience" or "I got talked into investing my life savings into a pyramid scheme and now I'm broke, but the experience really taught me a lesson") They're not really optimists, they're just adept at managing to get an education out of bad judgment or rotten luck.

I probably have some characteristics of both these types, and share some qualities with a lot of others. I think of myself as an eternal student not just because I always claim to be of student age, but because I feel there's always something to learn. Not in the profound sense as in "There's so much to discover in the world" or even in the practical sense as in "I want to learn Latin". It's more that I often find that there are just a lot of things I don't seem to know, as in "The deadline is TODAY? Why didn't anyone tell me that?" or "How was I supposed to know you can't make a left turn there?" I like the concepts of learning by doing and trial and error, and for the most part I just like finding things out my way, even if it turns out to be the hard way.

At any rate, there is always much to learn and much to know, and for this eternal student, the euphoria of reaching the eureka moment after an arduous process of knowledge and discovery is always followed by the feeling that I should have just read the freaking manual instead.