A Weird Sign of Homesickness

When I arrived in the US to study, I tried to acculturate to the country by speaking in (shame, shame) slang. The dictionary definition of this word is not what I mean; in the Philippines, speaking in slang simply means speaking with an (affected) American twang. Of course, there were practical reasons for this; mainly, my classmates couldn't understand me if I spoke in my usual Philippine-style English. So there I was, trying to speak like them, with my intonation going up at the end of sentences like there was a question mark at the end of each statement(?). For the first three months, I thought I got the hang of it and congratulated myself on sounding just like a native.

A week ago, though, I noticed that I started stuttering when I'd talk to my classmates. I suddenly found myself starting sentences with "ano..." and ending them with "yata" or "kasi", even though I knew full well that no one had any idea what those words meant. I realized soon enough that these lapses into speaking in Filipino was a sign that I was homesick. I've generally adjusted to life alone so far from home, but I guess a part of me was rebelling against all the English-speaking I'd been doing. My tongue couldn't take it anymore, and it missed the the doubled vocabulary that speaking in Taglish afforded.

I may have acclimatized to the Missouri cold, and I may have weaned myself away from following Filipino time... but I've found that it will take a lot more effort not to miss speaking, joking, and cursing in Filipino.