Three Good Things

I am a pessimist. Definitely a "glass half-empty" kinda girl. I remember realizing and articulating this to myself as early as the fifth grade. I am not lucky enough to have Biljana's "lifelong subscription to pink eyeshades :)". I've often thought that wearing rose-colored glasses just causes you to trip, stumble, or lose your way.

There are advantages to being a pessimist. You are not as disappointed as others might be when things don't turn out well, mostly because that's exactly what you expected to happen. However, it can also make your mood dark and even unhappy for extended periods of time, because you fail to see the good that often does happen.

Felicity told me of one way to fight such dark moods in a very practical manner. She said that everyday, you should think of three good things that happened to you. At the beginning, you might find it hard to accomplish this seemingly simple task. But eventually, you will find even more than just three things to celebrate each day.

It's nearly midnight now, and I've only thought of two good things that happened today. Looks like I need a lot more practice before I get the hang of this positive thinking thang.

Again, Post-Vacation Blues

I'm back in CoMO, and I can't believe that I hadn't been here for 24 hours yet before an ice storm struck. Yes, we are in the middle of a severe ice storm, which is worse than a snow storm. That's because ice makes the roads so slippery, much more so than snow. So, I'm stuck at home, unable to do anything that involves venturing out of my apartment. In an attempt at being productive, I tried to walk to the laundromat; but even if it's just a few feet away from my apartment, the sleet just made it extremely difficult.

So I have no choice but to stay here alone at home, cursing the storm and longing for the balmy Cali weather that I left behind just a day ago. Because of all this time on my hands, I'm also forced to think about things that I pushed to the back of my mind over the holidays, such as the impending end of my 2-year long vacation... oops, I meant studies.

My stint at Missouri has given me a false sense that reality has been suspended back home; that people, places, and things were frozen in time and that they will be exactly the way they were when I left. This is also commonly known as denial. However, I know that when I get home after I graduate, I will feel out of sorts. Two years after all, is two years.

The company I work for has undergone a lot of changes; Chino, Trixi, and Quincho have grown a little bit or even a lot; my favorite restaurants may have closed or changed menus; people will have moved on without me; and relationships with those close to me may be awkward. It is just not very easy to pick up where you left off when so much has changed.

This ice storm better not last too long. It's making me sad.

The End Is Near

I've been in Cali for a little bit more than three weeks now, and it's been nonstop eating and doing touristy things since Day 1. Because my parents, my brother John, and his wife Tin are here from the Philippines, we tried to see all the sights we could and do the whole Southern California tourist bit... Disneyland, Legoland, Seaworld, San Diego Zoo, and today, Universal Studios. It's also been a great excuse to eat at new places, and generally just to eat a lot (I cannot even begin to count the bags of blazin' hot Cheetos and gallons of ice cream consumed). It's been fun, but a bit tiring and extremely fattening. I will definitely need to detoxify and decompress after all this through the vital post-vacation vacation.

I'm flying home to Columbia, Missouri on Thursday, and classes don't start till Tuesday. I have a few days to ruminate (which I failed to do as the year 2007 began), as well as counteract what I like to call the "water retention" which took place after excessive salt and carb consumption, before I go back to school.

I'm now a bit sad not just because I won't see my family again for awhile, but also because I don't know when I will get another month-long break after I graduate. I know this last semester will whizz by and before I know it I will have to think about what I want to do with the rest of my life and stop slacking (at least for a while).

You would think that these things get easier when you get older, but they don't, at least not for me. Case in point, after watching Shamu and the dolphins at Seaworld, I thought that I should study to become a marine biologist (Okay, okay. I confess, the first thing I thought of wanting to be after the show was an animal trainer). This, after spending the last couple of years trying to get my Master's in journalism.

It's strange to be so old and still not know what you want to be when you grow up.

Happy New Year!

Since it's the first day of the new year, I feel compelled to write an entry to start 2007 right. Right now though, I have no profound thoughts to share, no funny anecdotes to tell. Just a couple of things.

First, I've decided that I should do as Bridget Jones did (which Felicity reminded me about when I talked to her about resolutions), and put my New Year's resolutions into effect on January 2. After all, it really is unreasonable and plain unrealistic to go on a diet and live a clean life immediately after New Year's Eve, when you are still reeling from your excesses.

The other thing is, I've been thinking of a short mantra to keep in mind (like Caye did) as I head onto the year. You know, the kind that makes you feel that there's SOMEthing you at least try to live by. One I thought of is a line from Little Miss Sunshine, which my family and I just finished watching a few minutes ago. It comes from the conversation between Frank and Dwayne, my two favorite characters in the movie. The 15-year-old Nietzsche fan said, "Do what you love, and f**k the rest". Amen.