Work excuse of the week (year?)

I got this text message from one of my staff members this morning, and I'm writing it here verbatim. He was asking to be excused from our weekly meeting. I have to say, it's the most creative excuse I've heard so far in my career. So creative (and honest) that I just had to accept it as legitimate.

"maam, hindi po ako maka attend ng miting. ang pimples ko. hndi ako makalabas. i dnt look good. sorry po. please."

Translated from Tagalog and text-speak, it says, "Ma'am, I won't be able to attend the meeting. My pimples. I can't go out. I don't look good. I'm sorry. Please."

Monkey see, monkey do

I recently had dinner with my climbing friend Angel, and she had this story to tell about her three-year old son, Tyke.

Angel's husband Mars was driving in horrible traffic, with Angel in front and Tyke at the back. Road rage was building up in Mars, and he honked his horn at a particularly rude driver. He said something equivalent to "Get out of the way!"

Tyke: Papa, you forget to say something.
Mars: What's that, Tyke?
Tyke: Ashul.

Angel has since decided to be a tad more careful with what she says around her kid.

The Chowchow from China

Note: After this blog entry, I researched on this story for a few months, and have concluded that it's some kind of new urban legend, as I've heard it from so many people, featuring slightly different details. Unless someone can give me the actual name of the person who supposedly bought the "chowchow", I am sad to say it will have to be filed as "fiction" in my book. I still think it's a good story, though.

My friend Zara told me a true story that's got me cracking up each time I think of it. I think this story is worth sharing with many people, and I've in fact told and re-told it to many friends already.

Anyway, Zara heard this story from her friend Luanne. Luanne has an officemate, whom we shall call "O". "O" recently went to China, and while she was travelling, she came across a chowchow, which is a popular pet dog in Manila, for sale. She proceeded to buy the dog and planned to make it a pet back home.

On the way back to the Philippines, she had to go through quarantine with her newly-acquired pet, first in China. "O" encountered no problems with the airport officials, and she was able to fly home. She also had no problems clearing the dog when she arrived in Manila.

"O" excitedly brought her new pet back to her house. She went back to work, but her helper called, sounding quite panicked. "Ate!" she said. "Yung aso, sinapian! Naglalakad na parang tao, at sinusundan-sundan ako!" (The dog is possessed! It's walking like a human and is following me around!)

"O" rushed home to see what the matter was. She brought the dog to the veterinarian, and had it checked to see if anything was wrong with it. She thought that maybe the front paws were infected with something, which made the dog favor its back legs.

After a brief examination, the vet found out what the problem was. "Hindi ito chowchow. Bear ito." (This is not a chowchow. It's a bear.)

New Year's Resolutions

So... more than half of January has already passed by, and I have yet to start working on my new year's resolutions. I've thought of another way to have a brand new start. Chinese new year is on February 14, so I've decided to implement my list of resolutions then.

No, in case you're asking; "stop procrastinating" is not on that list.

Welcome, 2010! You're going to be fabulous!

Watching fireworks from the ABS-CBN helipad

For some inexplicable reason, I have a strong feeling that 2010 will be a great year. Maybe it's blind optimism born of the desire to believe that this year will somehow cancel out the bad things that happened to our country in '09. Maybe I've been reading too many astrology websites. Or maybe it's just a premonition of something that's going to come true.

Whatever it is, I'm going to try to maintain this highly positive state of mind that comes so rarely to me. I have my usual list of new year's resolutions that I will try to tick off. Oops, make that... resolutions that I WILL tick off. To paraphrase Yoda, there is no try, only do. There are so many things I want to achieve this year, and I am hopeful that they will be realized by year's end.

Bring it on, 2010!

A cliche for the times

A friend of mine posted a funny line as her facebook status. I thought it was hilarious because it's put a new twist on an old "adage for life". The saying went like this.

"Dance like the photo's not tagged, love like you've never been unfriended, tweet like nobody's following."

As far as I'm concerned, it's much better than the original version. (Was it "Dance like nobody's watching, love like you've never been hurt..."? I forget the other part of it.)

My first dive with a WHALE SHARK!!!

I went diving in Leyte over the All Saints’ Day weekend with my friends, expecting nothing much more than the novelty of diving in a place we’d never been to before. We were surprised by one of the biggest treats a diver could ever experience- seeing the biggest fish on earth, the whale shark or butanding, in the deep. Dindo banged his tank repeatedly to call everyone’s attention, then signaled everyone to stay back. All the divers tried to get closer to get a better look, and take pictures and videos. Fred couldn’t resist, and touched the butanding’s left fin. We all followed the slow-moving creature as it swam. I looked for someone to put in the frame with the shark, and as usual, lucky Berg was in the best position to be in the video. Then one of our DMs, it seemed, couldn’t help himself and pulled on the creature from below, causing the shark to swim away in surprise. (We all gave him a hard time about it afterward.)