Work excuse of the week (year?)

I got this text message from one of my staff members this morning, and I'm writing it here verbatim. He was asking to be excused from our weekly meeting. I have to say, it's the most creative excuse I've heard so far in my career. So creative (and honest) that I just had to accept it as legitimate.

"maam, hindi po ako maka attend ng miting. ang pimples ko. hndi ako makalabas. i dnt look good. sorry po. please."

Translated from Tagalog and text-speak, it says, "Ma'am, I won't be able to attend the meeting. My pimples. I can't go out. I don't look good. I'm sorry. Please."

Monkey see, monkey do

I recently had dinner with my climbing friend Angel, and she had this story to tell about her three-year old son, Tyke.

Angel's husband Mars was driving in horrible traffic, with Angel in front and Tyke at the back. Road rage was building up in Mars, and he honked his horn at a particularly rude driver. He said something equivalent to "Get out of the way!"

Tyke: Papa, you forget to say something.
Mars: What's that, Tyke?
Tyke: Ashul.

Angel has since decided to be a tad more careful with what she says around her kid.